My dear, the word should is not your friend!
Should is the voice of mom, dad, church, teacher, doctor, expert, all rolled into one. It is a word that holds you back and ties you down. It is a word generated by the mind, the fearful self critical mind, not the heart or the voice of your soul. It is not the real truth of you.
Of course, sometimes what you “should” do and what your heart wants to do are in alignment. Can you discern when this is true? Do not lie to yourself!
Do you fear that you will not belong, that you will be cast out if you follow your heart and not your shoulds? Perhaps it is time for a new group, new friends, a new tribe that celebrate the deep inner beauty and kaleidoscope of gorgeous colors and patterns that is you!